Why You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others On Social Media

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Why You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others On Social Media

It’s a blogger’s job to stay in the know and create a space on social media for themselves. For many bloggers out there, that means spending countless hours on Instagram working on creating eye-catching grids, captions, and insta stories. Every influencer has a unique voice and always have something different that sets them apart from the rest… and yet we somehow always get sucked into the social media black hole of comparisons. All. the. time. We compare ourselves to other bloggers and influencers — the ones we see on the Explore page, the ones we’re inspired by, and the ones we might even be a little bit jealous of. But that’s no way to live your life. There’s only one of you out in the world… so what gives?

I’m not afraid to admit that I compare myself to other bloggers pretty often. It’s hard not to, but I’ve recently thought to myself “why?” Why do we feel the need to compare ourselves to others? So many of us feel like if we don’t have x amount of followers then that automatically means we’re not successful bloggers. Or if we don’t have perfectly crisp white backgrounds on our photos then maybe we’re not as professional or experienced as that blogger on your insta feed that does have those things. We care what others think of us and of course, we have to think of that when we’re building a reputation and brand online.

But it has to be to a certain extent. It’s difficult to come up with exact reasons for why we play into the little comparison games but guess what? You’re not perfect and no other blogger or influencer is.

And that’s okay. That’s the way it’s supposed to be. You don’t need to follow the crowd to be successful. You don’t need to post every single day and hold yourself up to high standards just because someone else does it. If it actually works for you to post every day then knock yourself out. But if it doesn’t, you don’t need to beat yourself up about it or go crazy trying to fulfill that goal.

I used to be that way. Now I post whenever I want. I’m busier now so I post whenever I can.

BLOGGERS: Do what you can. Don’t worry, you’re doing great. Click To Tweet

The Algorithm Woes

The Instagram algorithm is currently driving people mad. Bloggers are trying a million different methods to get the algorithm to work in their favor and so many are just fed up and frustrated by it. Yep, me too. Algorithms constantly change and it sucks when they’re not working for you.

And recently, people are complaining that they can’t see their favorite accounts on their feed anymore. There have been major talks about massive unfollow sprees. Bloggers have been unfollowing everyone and just following back the accounts they truly connect with. When I heard about this, I thought “no way, that’s crazy!” I literally thought it was insane because what if people unfollowed you back? You’re losing all the growth you worked so hard on!

Why you seriously need to stop comparing yourself to others on social media. Click To Tweet

But get this: it’s not so crazy after all. It’s actually a great idea.

I used to be a beauty blogger before I rebranded. And don’t get me wrong, I love makeup but I no longer wanted to see SO much of it on my feed. I actually wanted to see more bloggers, more inspirational + motivating content — I wanted to see more bloggers’ journeys. But what did I do? I put up with the overflow of content on my feed that I wasn’t exactly interested in anymore. And half the people I followed? I had no clue who they even were. Now that’s crazy.

But still. I was so afraid to take the risk of unfollowing people. Something was holding me back and that’s what people thought of me. Why was what people thought of me preventing me from doing something? When I realized how ridiculous that sounded, I decided to take the leap and now I’m currently in the process of a mass unfollowing for my own Instagram account. I’ve only unfollowed a couple hundred and the unfollows and blocks are coming in droves. And that is expected. I started questioning whether I should have let my audience know what I was doing or ask them if this was okay to do.

And then I thought “well, wait a minute. I don’t need anyone’s permission to do what I want with MY social media accounts.”

Because I don’t and neither do you!

This Instagram cleanup has just made me realize that these people who were following me simply just wanted a follow back — nothing more. They didn’t actually like my content or else they wouldn’t have unfollowed me back, right? It’s the follow/unfollow game that has gotten really old, really fast. I was shocked to see people actually blocked me for unfollowing them too.

The people who truly love your account and your blog will stay.

The people who feel inspired by you, who feel connected and uplifted by you are the ones who will stay.

And that’s who your community is.

Those who feel connected + inspired by you will stick with you through anything. That’s what community is all about. Click To Tweet

Why You Need To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others On Social Media

My Blogger Safe Haven

Throughout this process, I’ve figured out my blogger safe haven. And that’s Twitter! Twitter has SUCH a different vibe than Instagram. I love hanging out with other bloggers on the platform because I feel like people care less about numbers on there and are more open about themselves and their journey.

It just feels so real. I constantly see positivity and support in the blogger community on Twitter. It’s just so different and awesome. I feel like Instagram is more about carefully-crafted captions while Twitter is just more fun and not about being so perfect, ya know?

Twitter is my blogger safe haven 👩🏻‍💻🙌🏻 Click To Tweet

I used to never use Twitter for my blog because I never knew what in the world I could ever tweet about, but I worked my way up and became more confident about showing who I am.

I used to be terrified of showing the real me and I was worried about what people thought. Afraid that people I knew IRL would find my blog + insta. Now I’m no longer afraid to show who I am online. And you shouldn’t be either.

Be yourself and don’t ever apologize for it.

Stop comparing yourself to others on social media.

It will get you nowhere. I’ve learned so much about this over the last year of blogging and I’m so grateful that being a blogger has shaped who I am as a person. It’s changed me for the better. Here are some tips to remember when you’re feeling down and find yourself falling back into that comparison hole:

Reduce your time on social media

Even just a little bit. For real, just try it. I know it’s hard to do when your job is basically to be on social media, but it will help you so much. Set a certain time aside to browse through your feed, post, and connect with others. Don’t mindlessly spend hours on Instagram because that’s when you start feeling that comparison struggle creeping up on you. I have two Instagram accounts — one for my blog and a personal one for friends and family. I switch back and forth between the two so that I can get a look at fresh new things and keep up with the people I know IRL because it’s not always about blogging.

Actually connect with others

You’d be surprised how sweet and supportive other bloggers are in the blogger community. But you’d never know that unless you took the time to sincerely connect with those around you. Comment on pictures, reply to stories and participate in polls. You might even find a new friend this way so don’t be shy to put yourself out there and make connections.

Blogging is all about being social, isn’t it? So when you are spending time on social media, make sure you spending your time in a meaningful way. It can make all the difference.

Be honest with yourself

Don’t worry about a picture perfect life and stop giving a sh*t about numbers. Seriously. Who cares how many followers you have? Who cares how many likes you get? At the end of the day, you’re doing what you love. Instagram and other social media platforms should be a place of positivity for bloggers and a place to build a community with your audience. It shouldn’t be a competition. It doesn’t have to be a competition. There’s no race to the finish line. Let’s be honest: obsessing over numbers is unrealistic and a waste of time.

Someone’s middle is NOTHING like your beginning.

When you’re thinking about how successful XYZ blogger is, remember this: you are not the same as everyone else. Everyone’s journey is different. You might be a beginner while that other blogger has been at it for years. It may LOOK like a blogger turned into an overnight money-making machine in under 3 months but in reality, you don’t know if that’s their 3rd or 4th blog they’ve had.

I used to think some bloggers just became successful much faster than others and they knew something I didn’t, but when I looked more closely I discovered that some of these bloggers have been at it for years. You wouldn’t know it because you probably think that’s their first blog. You don’t know someone’s experiences or past.

Shake the feeling that if you don’t do what everyone else is doing then you’re not a “good” blogger.

Don’t feel the need to follow the crowd. If something doesn’t feel right or doesn’t feel like you, then don’t do it. It doesn’t define who you are as a blogger and it sure as hell doesn’t define who you are as a person.

Just because you didn’t achieve what someone else did that does not mean you’re not successful in your own way. Celebrate #allthewins — even the smallest. Set your own goals and compare yourself to YOU. Not anyone else. Use your own achievements to track your progress and see your milestones. Don’t track your progress based on someone else’s.

Remember that you’re good enough and you’re just as good as anyone else out there.

Things take time and you are working it. You have to make mistakes and go through failures to be successful. Bumps in the road will come. Be ready for them and react to them positively. Take them as another lesson learned.

Don’t be afraid to hit the unfollow button.

It’s there for a reason. You are not forced to follow any account that you are not interested in. There is nothing wrong with controlling what kind of content you want to see. You’re allowed to change your mind about what and who you like. You don’t owe anyone a follow-back. You don’t owe anyone anything.

There is no need to ever be comparing yourself to others on social media. So when you feel those negative vibes sneaking up on you, remember this: you’re doing great, babe.

So what do you say? Are you struggling with comparisons? Are you participating in an unfollow spree too? Let me know + sound off in the comments below!

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This Post Has 5 Comments

  1. Jasmine

    Great post! This is something I constantly struggle with and have to check myself often. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Amanda

      Same here! It happens to so many bloggers and we just need to remind ourselves not to go crazy and just be ourselves!

  2. Samantha Mariko

    This was such a great post and just what I needed to read! It’s the worst to start comparing yourself to others when all you need to do is be you and do you but I find myself falling into the trap once in a while. Thanks for all you insight on this topic!
    xo Samantha

    1. Amanda

      I’m so glad this could help, Samantha! A lot of the time, we might fall off the wagon and start comparing ourselves so it’s nice to remind ourselves every once in a while that we don’t have to be perfect.

  3. Nedra

    I really enjoyed this post. What most people don’t realize is that the average social media user may only share positive information.

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